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Work/Life: Great, You're Lookin' Bad!

I've just been chewed over by my well-meaning NY host.

He: I can't believe you posted that negative critique of your book on your blog. What if someone reads it and agrees with him?

Me: Why would I want him to buy the book?

My host was reacting in a normal kind of way. He thinks I'm making myself look bad, as if that's a bad thing. Read the critique.

Hugh Grant and Clinton haven't particularly suffered for their 15 minute stints of 'looking bad'. Paris Hilton makes headlines for something that might leave you and I with cancelled dinner dates and burning ears. And somehow we care, and if they did, they didn't for long.

Whether they admit or not, celebs know that all press, all feedback, is an opportunity. 'Better to be looked over than over looked.' Forget their diet habits, renovation tips and worthy causes, if there's anything to learn from a celeb, it's how they handle looking bad. We should stop putting them on a pedestal for how they earn a crust, and follow their cue. Shying away from something stereotypically 'bad' and you'll be 'looking worse'. Own it, and see what kinds of new people, events and circumstances show up in your life. Just for once. In my experience, they're things with substance, and they bring out the substance in you.

'Looking good' was parodied in the movie American Beauty, the immaculately dressed, disheveled housewife, sobbing, 'Always present an image of success.' Shoulder pads are no longer necessary, but a big cheesy smile, positive comments and material assets still seem to be the order of the day. Years ago I had those things to a modest degree, and I recall a friend telling me 'you have such a great life.' At the time the outside hull of me said 'yeah'. The inside squooshy part said, 'yeah .... but ... '

'Looking bad' is such an opportunity for growth, I call it the new 'looking good'. Let me use that book critique as an example. It got a gut-felt reaction out of a total stranger. When did you last get that in this society of turning your head or looking at your shoes when someone on the sidewalk comes your way? The reader simply didn't like it. OK. Then he expended considerable trouble and energy saying so. Thank you. He actually DID 'get' one of the points of the book, though he's probably not aware of it. Wunderbar! As a result, it gave me the impetus to write this blog entry, given that I was scratching around for something to bleat about today. Saved!

So I scored something far more interesting to me - how something I scribbled entered particular reader's life, how it left an impression, the heartfelt feedback, and the sharing of it with you. My book elicited an authentic response, and that's the only kind of response I am interested in. Authenticity in marketing, like platonic relationships in life, are vastly underrated.

Authenticity creates a kind of 'feedback frisson', and it's this frisson creates movement, change, cartwheels - it's what makes creativity possible.

Conversely, 'looking good' (as opposed to just 'being good') is fast becoming passé. Mainstream advertising has forever tried to snag the big fat hump in the bell curve. It turns out that the big fat hump doesn't buy it after all. A program on the excellent Oregon station Jefferson State Radio reported that while the hump might nod when asked in stilted research studies 'are these people beautiful?', only 13% actually vote with their dollars. That mere 13% makes it worthwhile for advertisers, which is why our screens and billboards bleat banal 'looking good' imagery 24/7. But that's wearing thin. When I see a billboard for an SUV trying so hard to say something old but making it sound new, it's obvious they're scraping the barrel. They don't realize the value of being fearlessly authentic, e.g. that funny line from the Dudley Moore movie 'Volvo. It's boxy, but it's safe,' is a good ad. It's utterly, irrefutably true, and makes you laugh, agree and like Volvo.

I remember being in the hot seat at Saatchi Costa Rica. We showed the client some belly laughs - including a Jack In The Box ad where Jack forces his way into the house of a complainer, chased him out the back and force fed him a shake, burger etc. The client love it and laughed so hard he almost fell off his chair, until we suggested he do the same. All of a sudden he turned white, and the resultant ad was the banal looking good trip that you've come to expect. Here's a spec ad for a tinny little car that got me thrown out of the boardroom - the main benefit and truth was that it was so cheap, it every Costa Rican family seemed to own one at one time or other:

So now, apparently advertisers are resorting to a twist on one of the oldest forms of marketing - paid word of mouth. Ever walk into a washroom and hear someone raving about a particular hair gel? Chances are, they're being paid to rant. I was standing on the street in Manhattan examining a menu outside a sandwich shop. A woman stopped behind us and said, 'this place is just great. Fantastic, wonderful wraps etc'. The result? Already pretty hungry, we went in and spend $25 on some artsy wraps and iced tea. It occurred to me, even before hearing the radio program, that she might be a tout for several vendors in the street, paid to simply loiter and laud and collect her commission later. Travelers to Asia will be familiar with this ancient practice - in Bangkok, my ex ended up with 6 poorly tailored white business shirts after a stunningly authentic tout convinced us that he was just a friendly guy swingin' by, thought we looked friendly and decided to say hi ...

I recall a Mooks streetwear catalog downunder from years ago, which featured what looked like a 70-year old man as the model, way before haute couture supremos got the idea. Wonderful creasyfaced grimaces, deep lines and old wisdom stared out of every page. It was well done, and somehow avoided being self-consciously hip because life was less ironic and more authentic back then. That was the start of 'looking good' by 'looking bad'. Things have accelerated beyond that now - mainstream advertising is constantly desperate to try all manner and means of getting your attention in 1.5 seconds (0.6 seconds adjusted for inflation of consumer expectation). Before long they'll be putting some stealth marketing additive in your food - monosodium glutamate is old school.

20 years ago a Norwegian friend told me a saying in his country which I paraphrase badly, but I hope you get the gist: Man wants most of all to be loved. If he can't be loved, he wants to be liked. If he can't be liked, he wants to be respected. If he can't be respected, he wants to be admired. If he can't be admired he wants to be feared. If he can't be feared he wants to be despised. But the last thing he wants is to be ignored.

If you look stereotypically good these days you might be ignored - I've finally kicked my media-fueled yearning to look and sound like a television newsbleater with a perfect blonde bob.

If you've got the guts to look bad, to not live in fear of phantoms, you'll be noticed, you'll polarize, you'll create 'frisson'. You'll have an opportunity to turn cartwheels, even if it's just in your own lunchtime. People are always going to think what they're going to think, and not say what they're dying to say, but you don't have to be like them.

I have to say my threshold for looking bad has been raised because of the life I lead. It's pointless hiding anything, it doesn't serve me. To live a life where there is no boundary between work and leisure lets me roam the planet more freely, and experience human nature more intensely, and to feel like I really can make a difference. Key to this is dismantling that stumbling block between looking good and looking bad, and just concentrate on trying to be good.

A friend of mine got himself into a spot of bother with the public once. People were coming up to him and saying,

'[So-and-so] is saying this about you'.

His response was always the same.

'Oh. Is that what people say.