Leadership: It's Perfect...Just Perfect
| posted by Donna KarlinToday was a fascinating day. I started with a new client, someone very high level in the organization and wasn’t sure what to expect as not only was she a new client but was new to the organization, so I hadn’t yet seen much of her in action.
As I usually do before starting my day Shadow Coaching™ my client is to see ongoing clients for a few moments for reality checks, scheduling, contracting and just to touch base. Today was no exception. What is different is that this organization is going through a major restructuring at all levels. Every department is short-staffed and on top of this, all the systems have to be changed to meet the growing needs so their entire world is in flux. Those in positions of leadership are doing twice the hours they were doing before to pick up the slack and to create a strategy for implementation of this giant re-org. Needless to say, tempers are short, people are burned out and there doesn’t seem to be an end in sight.
Strangely or wonderfully, I’m not sure which would be the most appropriate term, today seemed to be a turning point for me in my work because it was as if a switch was flipped and all of a sudden, many of my clients ‘got it’, i.e. they realized why I was saying what I was saying and gave it back to me in spades.
When this re-org began and they weren’t quite sure which foot to put in front of which first, a couple of my clients were having a very rough time. In our sessions I turned to them, separately and at separate times and asked, “What is so perfect about this when it clearly isn’t?” One almost threw something at me and the other cracked up because he’s never quite sure what will come out of my mouth. It was the start of a long insightful conversation.
Well a few months have passed and here I was with this new client standing at the elevator to go to a meeting when one of my other clients asked me how my day was going. I smiled and said “Fascinating” because it was….but they always are! He started grinning and turned to me and asked “What is so perfect about it when it clearly isn’t?” I told him just being asked that made it absolutely perfect!
He got it. He knew what I was dealing with, new leadership and all, and although I love chaos and the unexpected, after all it’s my life in a nutshell, he knew I saw it as perfect, just as he started seeing his chaotic world. Because of the change in perception, he started having fun with the craziness. Bottom line is, if you can’t enjoy the most intense, unpredictable times and those times are going to be sticking around for a while, then get out because in the world we live in, things are no longer predictable, no matter if you’re at the top of the totem pole or the bottom.
When I got to the meeting room another client who was having a really rough day saw me Shadowing my client and started smiling. When I asked why the smile? She said “I was just trying to figure out how I could tell you just how perfect this craziness is”. Yep….life is just perfect.
Can you look at something that happened to you today and ask yourself “What was so perfect about this when it clearly isn’t?” and have an answer? It works. And it’s contagious. Try it with your staff or peers when they’re going through a particularly rough time and see how the attitudes change on a dime. Fascinating!
It might sound simplistic, yet defining perfection for you is never simple. What it does is put things in perspective, take the power away from the chaotic moments and put it back in your hands. Nothing simple about that, not by a long shot.
Donna Karlin Executive and Political Shadow Coach Ottawa, Canada •www.abetterperspective.com



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Recent Comments | 7 Total
October 11, 2007 at 8:50am
Michele Malay CarterCongrats on your success. Humans are developmental creatures. It sounds like you have shepharded your clients through a developmental step change. These changes are by definition messy, painful, and awkward because they only occur when the pain of holding on to the old world view exceeds the pain of reaching for a new, undefined, and ambiguous one.
Each world view is a necessary step as it contains learning and growth which resolve the problems created by the proceeding developmental step. However, as each step resolves previous issues it, in turn, creates new ones which can only be resolved by taking the next step.
It doesn't feel perfect, but it surely is fascinating. To paraphrase Einstein, we cannot solve today's problems with the same thinking that created them.
October 11, 2007 at 2:04pm
Paul S MarkleFantastic! Had a chance to ask myself the what is so perfect about this when it clearly isn't" question for myself about 2 minutes after I read this. Rather than having a brief pity party because something I had counted on dematerialized through no fault of my own, I asked myself that question and got a couple of intriguing answers. Definitely helped me get to a "Better Perspective."
You rock Donna!!!
October 13, 2007 at 11:34am
Donna KarlinMichele, that is a great quote and a very appropos one. Each step in our evolution (if we choose to move forward and not stay stagnant) brings us a richer world. Sometimes it's a challenging one but even at that, it's perfect for us in some way.
Thank you for this perspective. It's definitely a thought provoking one!
October 13, 2007 at 11:36am
Donna KarlinHey Paul....it's amazing how asking a question seemingly as simple as "what's so perfect about this when it clearly isn't?" can create a paradigm shift, isn't it?
I'm glad it came in handy! Anything in your answers you'd care to share? Insights not necessarily specifics. I won't put you on the hot seat. Promise!
October 13, 2007 at 6:40pm
Paul MarkleDonna,
Keeping it simple I just recognized first of all that I'm not it or its not all about me (for the 1000th time) in terms of something I had been told would happen that didn't. Your "what's so perfect" question reminded me of one I ask which is "so what if (fill in the blank) doesn't happen?" Is that the only way to get to where you want. In other words its wise to have a backup plan!
It actually could lead to bigger and better things if the situation I wanted to happen did not. Best to not dwell on what might have been, but focus on what can be! I know this but have to be reminded on a semi-frequent basis it seems
:-)
Paul
October 15, 2007 at 4:57pm
Joe RaaschHi Donna,
What a great way to get at the essence of why people do what they do!
I call it the 'buzz' - the thing that makes you get out of bed in the morning. If people can reconnect with that 'buzz' - that 'perfection' - then they can make it through the day, the week, the project.
Thanks for another useful tool!
October 15, 2007 at 5:10pm
Donna KarlinHey Joe...
It's amazing how asking such a simple question can give one a completely new perspective on things....
Yep...life is perfect!
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