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FC NOW: The Fast Company Weblog

April 25, 2006

* How to Stay Awake in Boring Meetings

This just popped up in my inbox...
___

Do you keep falling asleep in meetings and seminars? What about those long and boring conference calls? Here's a way to change all of that.

1. Before (or during) the next meeting, seminar, or conference call, prepare yourself by drawing a square. I find that 5" x 5" is a good size. Divide the card into columns-five across and five down. That will give you 25 one-inch blocks.

2. Write one of the following words/phrases in each block:
Synergy, strategic fit, core competencies, best practice, bottom line, revisit, expeditious, to tell you the truth (or "the truth is), 24/7, out of the loop, benchmark, value-added, proactive, win-win, think outside the box, fast track, result-driven, knowledge base, at the end of the day, touch base, mindset, client focus(ed), paradigm, game plan, leverage.

3. Now check off the appropriate block when you hear one of those words/phrases.

4. When you get five blocks horizontally, vertically, or diagonally stand up and shout "BULLSHIT!"
___

"Real Testimonials" from satisfied players, after the jump...

"I had been in the meeting for only five minutes when I won." - Adam W., Atlanta

"My attention span at meetings has improved dramatically." - David T., Orlando

"What a gas! Meetings will never be the same for me after my first win." - Dan J., New York City

"The atmosphere was tense in the last process meeting as 14 of us waited for the fifth box." - Ben G., Denver

"The speaker was stunned as eight of us screamed 'BULLSHIT!' for the third time in two hours. The Bullshit Bingo Championship will be played at the next meeting." - Rod H

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Posted by Lucas Conley at April 25, 2006 11:26 AM | Category: humor | * 25 Comments

* 25 COMMENTS

Posted by: john at April 25, 2006 11:47 AM

CLASSIC!!

Posted by: Jen Harris at April 25, 2006 1:17 PM

there are several versions at www.bullshitbingo.com
We actually give this as part of our proposal to clients...they love it!

Posted by: G. Clay at April 26, 2006 1:20 AM

This is wonderful. I will make a Japanese version posthaste!

Posted by: pølsemann at April 26, 2006 5:52 AM

"bullshit-bingo" has been played - or at least recommendend ;) - for years in europe, e.g. norway and germany. very nice thing to do, but just once... :D

regards from norway
pølsemann

Posted by: jcunningham at April 26, 2006 12:53 PM

I first ran across something like this about six years ago - called "Buzzword Bingo" with a slightly different collection of words. Here's a site with a random buzzword card generator for different work-categories:

http://www.lurkertech.com/chris/bingo/index.html

-jeff

Posted by: Paavani at April 26, 2006 4:15 PM

funny.
But with few modifactions it could be really a good idea to remain awake.

Posted by: Mike at April 26, 2006 6:00 PM

How about, "going forward" ... I hate that the most, dunno why.

Posted by: Jackie Peters at April 26, 2006 9:50 PM

I can't see anyone winning all too quickly at Heavybag Media. We talk a lot of bull, but it's not usually cased in buzz words, and I don't think anyone sitting in one of our status meetings would have the patience to wait for five of them before they did anything about it. We call eachother on our BS almost before it's even left the offenders mouth.


Posted by: Sparky at April 27, 2006 12:59 AM

Finally a drug-free way to make it through the weekly marketing meeting!

Posted by: Andy at April 27, 2006 4:26 AM

The design team I was a part of at company that I worked for back in 1998 used to secretly play this. We had to stop, though when a coworker of mine mouthed the word "Bingo" within the first five minutes of our CEO giving a pep-talk and we all nearly peed ourselves laughing.

Jackie Peters: Way to make sure you get that link out there, dude.

Posted by: roger fulton at April 27, 2006 1:58 PM

my favorite for bullshit bingo was in marketing plans,...no, not the one'sI wrote. The one's I got back the boss didn't like and he re-wrote them.
Synergy..Moving forward, newthinking for the new
year. BS up to hear. Then, I was ordered to sign off on it and the numbers.
Couch City.

Posted by: Alan at April 28, 2006 8:23 AM

Well done on "Going forward" Mike, you beat me to the punch as I was reading down through this and it was the one buzzword that I hate above all others that hadn't been noted.

Posted by: Allison at April 28, 2006 9:56 AM

Funny stuff.... I wish I would never hear "TOUCH BASE" ever again!

Posted by: AV at April 28, 2006 10:14 AM

I'd include "utilize." I hate it with a fiery passion.

Posted by: Melissa at April 28, 2006 4:44 PM

I hate it when someone says " who took my stapler?" Gosh, it's like nails on a chalkboard.

Posted by: Dr. M.OConnell at April 28, 2006 4:50 PM

Who let Melissa near a computer?? Please, do not entertain her. She hasnt had her medication today and the shock therapy from yesterday didnt go so well. If anyone see's her, call security asap. We have her little white jacket waiting.

Dr. M Oconnell
Lead Psychiatrist
Moose Lake Mental Hospital

Posted by: Chace at November 6, 2006 2:13 AM

Well I won the game but I lost my job. When I screamed bullshit my old boss had security throw me out of the building. I stayed awake though!!!

Posted by: Avi Marcus at March 19, 2007 7:09 AM

For a way to stay awake that won't get you fired, take a look here.

Posted by: Avi Marcus at March 19, 2007 7:15 AM

Oops! Corrected:

For a way to stay awake that won't get you fired, take a look here.

Posted by: jeffrey at May 2, 2007 3:03 AM

how about " lets be the flagship in this "
i hear this shit about 20 tines an hour

Posted by: cathy at January 15, 2008 1:45 AM

"Things just suddenly fell into place, and all of a sudden I found myself in contention for the bullshit bingo finals"

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